victory screen for the retro arcade classic Snack Liberator
post-triumph infernoscape
full-on burning crater routine for the Snack Oppressor's ultra-tech base secreted away in the heart of the Amazon
your generic militarized headbanded shonen hero silhouettes himself against a setting sun, future rifle butt-resting against a saucily cocked hip
scanning widescreen close-up of your hero's wet, quivering eyeball jellies
black and white freeze frame on eyes
text:
SNACK FREEDOM HAS BEEN RESTORED TO THE PEACELOVING PEOPLES OF EARTH. BUT NEW DANGERS DWELL JUST OVER EVERY HORIZON. WHEN WILL HOMO SAPIENS GIVE UP THE EVILS OF WARFARE? PERHAPS WE SHOULD GIVE OUR HOPES TO THE TWENTY-FIRST CENTURY . . .
cut to a panoramic shot of a spectral future city miraging itself across the setting sun
text:
NEVER GIVE UP THE VISION OF EMOTION'S FUTURE!
obliterating white light
we are now standing in the Oval Office
pixel art Ronald Reagan shakes our hand
Reagan says, "Fine work, son. But I have just one question for you . . . are you my biological father?"
close-up of shonen hero's confused face as he says, "Uhhhh . . .!?"
gang of spiritual advisors, lawyers, and lobbyists hustle Reagan offscreen just as his head starts bobbing all over atop a loose spring
White House dining staff brings in a tray of Cokes and cheeseburgers
freeze frame on shonen hero eating a burger with gusto
on-screen text:
PLEASE PLAY AGAIN ON HARD-ON DIFFICULTY.
