. . . PROTEIN CIGARETTES.
They don't even have to contain actual protein in 'em. Just print the words PROTEIN CIGARETTES on the packaging.
Hire on a bunch of social media influencers to hype 'em as part of the Keto Diet or Atkins or whatever happens to be trending inside the misinformation cesspools of AM radio, podcasts, Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, Instagram, etc.
And then you know what you do?
You kick the fuck back and let your eyes go WIIIIIDE as a mountain range of cash money manifests before you.
That's all you gotta do!
