POETIC VIDEO GAME REVIEW #20XX.
Q: TRUE ENDING?
There's no way to know by just playing it as a General Issue Consumer. All kindsa crazy shit could be buried in the code. You'll never know unless you burrow deep into the guts. Sure, you could wait for other people to do it, post it online. That'll work for popular games. But if you're playing an obscure title, well, it might come down to you. You might have to be the band.
or
if you're a True Rebel, you invent your own True Ending inside your imagination, and call it a day. But you've got to be strong to do this. People will give you no end of shit. They'll say you're a cheat, that you're wrong, that you're not a True Hardcore Gamer. They'll accuse you of enjoying flavor text and watching all the cut scenes and actually caring about the story. You'll be an outcast, forever isolated from the global community of Gamers. You'll be cursed to be free to live your life with ecstasy and joy and imagination beyond the bogus values of Hardcore Gaming and the grotesque and exploitative industry that it sustains. How could you possibly live with that much freedom? Your shit will surely spontaneously combust! Beware!!!
A: FINAL BOSS.
A challenge
sufficient
to make the time invested
seem justified
or
the final boss is an arcade con
unfairly dangerous and resilient
just to eat as many quarters as possible
or
is it your desire
to not let go?
maybe
this time
you win
by letting it drop
moving on with your life
or
you've no choice
but to let it become your life
like Tetris
if you gave up Tetris
what would you gain?
I can't think of any upside to that one
to throwing Tetris in the trash
it's Tetris, buddy!
or
maybe this is the one you can't win
or
it's an anticlimax
it's no wizard
just some dorko at a control console
pulling levers
jerking off by proxy
or
the final boss dies of a bad flu
lotsa people die of flu every year
or
could be heart attack, that happens, too, due to lack of preventive care due to the permanent healthcare access crisis,
or
maybe the final boss is one of these dumbass anti-vaxxers and the COVID-19 zaps 'em before you even get off a shot,
or
it could be a robot whose software mind crashes 'cause it missed an update-goddamn wifi is spotty in some regions
hey
maybe it's not about you, y'know?
maybe you're the one suffering delusions of protagonist-hood, hmm?
maybe YOU are the final boss, just scootin' around, waiting for a heavy blade to fall upon your neck, and you didn't even know it!
well
it could also be all of the above
multiverses are trendy
but
mostly the odds are
that all the outre possibilities
will simply collapse into Protagonist
why be overcomplicated?
why not stick with the tried and the true, eh?
people get upset when you do new things, weird things,
novelty enrages,
but
it's also true
that familiarity breeds contempt
that same-again lends itself to snark
but fortunately
established franchises keep on truckin'
even the haters go along
catching second hand reputations
by taking their shots
it's like watching YouTubers:
is anyone saying what they actually think,
or is it all dumbed-down Andy Kaufman shit, is it all just iterations of LonelyGirl15?
hard to tell
this deep into Post-Literacy
when inauthenticity isn't just a career path
but an aspiration
a fuckin' dream
how full of shit can I be
and still make a mountain of cash?
no bottom yet detected by advanced instrumentation
-November 2016-November 2022
